Copenhagen Cowboy Review (NETFLIX)
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Phone Time - 1.5hrs
Run Time - 6 eps = 6 hrs
OH SHIT Moments - 10+
Good Eps - 4 of 6
Should You Watch? Only If You're Very High
COPENHAGEN COWBOY is the latest MONSTROSITY from Nicolas Winding Refn, which means nothing to you unless you've seen DRIVE (2011) or BRONSON (2008), and I say that with total love because THIS SHOW IS THE WEIRDEST THING YOU'LL WATCH IN A LONG TIME. I'll explain what that means soon but first WHO ARE YOU TO WATCH THIS? Well YOU ARE THE HOME ALONE GUY OR GIRL who has recently eaten a large dose of edibles and/or a low amount of psychedelics which are due to kick in any minute. If you're really high you'll get lost in the EPILEPTIC LEVEL STROBES or the OTHER WORLDLY SHOTS OF FOLIAGE or the constant, overwhelming, and BRIGHT NEON COLORS WHICH PENETRATE YOUR SOUL. YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO LOOK AWAY and suddenly you'll have spent 6 HOURS WITH YOUR HEART POUNDING in sync with the UNRULY AND PROFOUND MUSIC which accompanies all the right moments. Trust me you'll want that extra gummy to get yourself all the way in, DO NOT WATCH THIS SOBER.
Unless you're a sincere art-head who wants to analyze and glorify THE BEAUTIFUL AND OBVIOUSLY PAINSTAKING DETAIL. Also YOU MIGHT WANT TO BE ALONE for this one because Nicolas Winding Refn is the self-proclaimed "Pornographer of Cinema" which means there are an unbelievable amount of moments that YOU MIGHT BE EMBARASSED TO BE CAUGHT WATCHING and all without one female nipple or male dick. So if you're looking for A DISTURBING AND CRUELY ARTISTIC RIDE THROUGH HELL then get your ass to the weed store and make sure your relationships are on a solid foundation and go for it.
When I say this show is a monster I don't mean that it's massively popular or that it had an unbelievable budget or even that it has a wild cast, it has none of that. It's a monster in the sense that it comes out of the dark, grabs you by the head and makes you scream until you wake up and see the world in a different light for a couple of hours.
THIS IS WHAT I CALL A "SNOW DAY SHOW" which is close to a recess movie but insanely different. A snow day show (or movie) is YET AN OTHER FANTASY BEING LIVED OUT by those of us that played pretend when we were bored. If you remember playing pretend cause you were trapped inside on a snow day or a day off from school and your parent took the day off, but was most likely hiding from you in a closet or shed, then you know what I'm talking about. THIS SHOW IS THE KIND OF PRETEND YOU HAD TO PLAY WITH YOUR SISTER where you had to let her have a say and that meant the characters were all of a sudden vampires going from one fantastical land to another really quickly and EVERYONE IS AFRAID OF HER CAUSE SHE CAN SUDDENLY FIGHT AND CAST CURSES. Now this was the older brothers game to begin with so IT'S GOT ALL THE DRUGS,GUNS, AND VIOLENCE TO GO WITH IT BUT then he had to let his sister play and now IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE. It’s BEAUTIFUL AND EVIL NON-SENSE but what else were we going to do? Smoke cigarettes with uncle Tommy in the garage?
Imagine a mashup of A Clockwork Orange and The Shining in terms of music and vibe. The subject matter is nothing like those movies but the vibe took me there. The subject matter is more like if you made Pusher, Neon Demon, ValHalla Rising, and Bronson fight to the death but they all die in the ring and their blood and guts amalgamate into a new creature formed from a spell cast on it by the devil. This is a subtly supernatural gangster mini-series that follows Angela Bundalovic A PETITE "GIRL-BOY" WITH AN ANTON CHIGURH LEVEL HAIRCUT and her journey through the modern version of hell. She may be an angel or the bringer of life and she may be fighting against the bringer of death and his demonic family but she's also entangled with every type of gangster in Copenhagen. They manage to create real tension with seriously long pauses and solidly stoic shots but also dizzying circle shots which reveal tidbits of a scene at a time and maintain creepy vibes. The beginning of the show is the beginning of a very promising arc which doesn't end the way I would like it to but then again I was the most sober I've ever been for this and probably wouldn't have cared with a 200mg edible in me.
This is Nicolas Winding Refn's Treequel which means that he basically took a series of movies that the sequels would usually ruin and jammed them into a show so that they can all be binged and forgotten pretty quickly. It's also filled with a shit load of trees which somehow wasn't the problem the last 2 episodes were the problem.
For the most part I don't think Refn being buried in garbage at Netflix is a good idea because I have to pay close attention to his whole life to know when his new things are coming out which is why I'm reviewing this 6 months after it's release. On the other hand I can understand his motivation. He has plenty of wild ideas that require a very niche audience and Netflix has a massive thirsty audience and a massive budget to do anything to keep the subs from burning down their respective countries. Refn is playing it smart, it gets buried, his true fans know where to find it, and he can get anything he wants made. The price he pays for that is a limited audience which I don't think he minds.
So if you're looking for one of those shows that you watch when you're so high that you think about calling an ambulance every couple of hours then Copenhagen Cowboy is the right choice. You'll be mesmerized by the colors, entranced by the music and totally confused by the story but not so much that you turn it off. You'll be in "stoned alone heaven" and if you have a significant other that is willing to take this journey with you and doesn't judge you for wanting to experience something weird and different then marry them.
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By: Nick G